A client from Poland
This young woman and her son were my clients at HearSay back in 2015 and 2016.
In her words, she had to fly from the matrimonial home with her 19 months son to Women's Refuge in 2009 due to abusive and very controlling conduct of her ex husband and the father of her child. Her ex-husband started court proceedings to get full custody of their son. Apparently, he portrayed himself as the victim and falsely accused her of the things he had been doing to her and their child (in her words "brainwashing, poisoning against the other parent, child's neglect, intimidation, manipulation" etc.) ruining her reputation wherever he could.
The other professionals involved unfortunately failed to distinguish a perpetrator and a victim and more and more contact was granted to the abusive narcissistic father along with more power and control. She was traumatised not only by the abusive conduct of the ex-husband but also by judges, GPs, social workers, cafcass officers who unwittingly aided the charming, manipulative abuser. Instead of getting protection from the abuse for her and her son she was forced to co-parent with this abusive father and husband. It was very challenging task for her as the years of emotional and psychological abuse had taken its toll. The former husband made 3 attempts to get sole residence of their son and whilst he wasn't successful the court proceedings were traumatizing and difficult for her to cope with.
In her words, she had to fly from the matrimonial home with her 19 months son to Women's Refuge in 2009 due to abusive and very controlling conduct of her ex husband and the father of her child. Her ex-husband started court proceedings to get full custody of their son. Apparently, he portrayed himself as the victim and falsely accused her of the things he had been doing to her and their child (in her words "brainwashing, poisoning against the other parent, child's neglect, intimidation, manipulation" etc.) ruining her reputation wherever he could.
The other professionals involved unfortunately failed to distinguish a perpetrator and a victim and more and more contact was granted to the abusive narcissistic father along with more power and control. She was traumatised not only by the abusive conduct of the ex-husband but also by judges, GPs, social workers, cafcass officers who unwittingly aided the charming, manipulative abuser. Instead of getting protection from the abuse for her and her son she was forced to co-parent with this abusive father and husband. It was very challenging task for her as the years of emotional and psychological abuse had taken its toll. The former husband made 3 attempts to get sole residence of their son and whilst he wasn't successful the court proceedings were traumatizing and difficult for her to cope with.
"I had some individual counselling sessions with Dr Kitty Ruth Morgan-Jones. My son and myself also had some play sessions with her. The therapeutic sessions received from HearSay proved to be very beneficial for both of us. Mine and my son's feelings have been finally listen to and validated. I was reassured that keeping educating myself on a subject of narcissistic emotional abuse and stages of healing and recovery was a very good idea. Dr Ruth confirmed what I discover earlier about my child. His behaviour problems were not only the results of being subjected to emotional abuse from the hands of his father. He has displayed features of so called "spirited" child: hyperactive, prone to anger outbursts, impulsive, strong willed etc. My relationship with my son has been always close and strong, despite my ex's attempts to ruin it, but parenting tips how to handle spirited child offered by Dr Ruth made our relationship even stronger.
"We are both coping very well since the therapeutic sessions has stopped. Unfortunately our difficult circumstances has not changed but we getting stronger and stronger thanks to support from people like Dr Ruth Morgan-Jones."
A Transformation Story
Christine was referred to me by her paediatrician. She was brought by her parents for assessment when she was nine and a grade five student. Her parents explained that she was very distressed due to ongoing bullying at her primary school. While the parents complained to the school, only a half-hearted effort was made to correct the situation. To make matters worse, some of the teachers began to blame Christine for somehow triggering the situation. The school went so far as to suggest that Christine was on the autistic spectrum and should be assessed for this. As Christine was very articulate and engaged well, I immediately assessed her as spirited - potentially a gifted child. We used her facility with words to help her to heal herself. She kept a log of incidents at school which we could talk over together. She began to have more insight and to see that her ‘ differentness’ was being misunderstood by both the teachers and her peers. She was able to express some of her frustrations through sand play and crafts. Taking part in such activities helped her to relax and to feel less anxious. Very gradually she seemed to grow in confidence. Her parents confided that her outbursts and OCD were less and she was able to rebuild her trust in adults.
I also had sessions with Christine’s parents on their own. They were able to see how Christine was actually very much like her father’s mother and that she would benefit from more time and contact with him. Family adjustments were made so that this could occur. As father and daughter were both on the anxious side, it was planned that they would take a yoga class together.
I also had sessions with Christine’s parents on their own. They were able to see how Christine was actually very much like her father’s mother and that she would benefit from more time and contact with him. Family adjustments were made so that this could occur. As father and daughter were both on the anxious side, it was planned that they would take a yoga class together.
"In the end, the professional assessment of Christine by Dr Morgan-Jones was fully accepted by the paediatrician at Heathside and that information was then passed onto the primary school who were then forced to amend their records which in turn had a knock-on effect on Christine’s academic prospects for secondary school. The fact that we even had to go through this whole ordeal and that our child had to suffer so much is a travesty, had the school just done their due diligence our daughter could have been spared the emotional trauma, and much time and money could have been saved. However, with Hearsay and the Paediatrician on our side offering both support and counselling we were able support our daughter mentally and emotionally, prove that she was not autistic, and that she should be treated like any other prospective student, and that she deserved to go to a school which valued her and her academic abilities.
Thankfully, Christine as a 12 year old, Year 8 student and about to select her GCSE’s is much changed, she has blossomed at Grammar school which she loves, is doing very well academically, and crucially has grown in confidence, has found new friends and has extremely supportive teachers who encourage her both academically and personally; Christine likes herself again."